THIS CRAZY PLANET WE CALL BOB

Wherever you are, there are worlds you don't even know about. This ain't no goddamn mofomufunkinmotherfucking alien sheeit, this is some deep spiritual shit dude, this shit is so deep and meaningful man, that um... you um... might fall in or something. All you need to do to reach these worlds you don't know about is open the door and walk. Now. Whatever you are wearing, whatever you have with you, just open the door. Walk. Turn left or right if you want. Follow routes you know until you come to routes you don't know. Keep walking a bit more from there, and you will find new worlds. Settle down there if you like, keep walking if you don't. If you are really daring you can enter the mechanised age and take a car, bus, train, (no taxis), ship or plane. Or anything else that helps you go to new worlds. If you're scared of going just in your flimsy t-shirt, shorts, no wallet and bare feet in this weather, then you are perfectly justified (as long as you don't mind being looked down upon) in planning, and packing up as much as you can carry from your present world and opening the door, walking, and disappearing. Your old world will run out eventually. You will be somewhere new.

I'm not advocating change at all. I'm not telling you to run away without telling anyone. In fact, if you were to ask me, I would advise you to continue to stagnate the status quo. I would advise you to find your life and world that you love and be lazy, bored, but still inexplicably happy. Find your life and sleep. What I am telling you to do is be aware that there are worlds out there that you don't even know about. You have your safe little bubble where you have all the answers, to the point that you can pre-empt the questions, but I tell you, in my rôle as a sort of abusive father figure, that you know nothing. Walk. Find new questions. Answer them. Walk. Find new questions. Answer them. Walk. The leeriness of Time tells you that you must form your own religion, and place your finger on dots, which is all well and good, but ultimately you are left with answers. What the hell kinda good is that mofomufunkingmotherfucking sheeit dude?

The Bermuda Triangle, to stay eerily on topic, despite your petty objections, is not what you thought it to be. The Bermuda Triangle is - and don't ask me how I know this, cos I'm probably about to tell you, if you would only be patient for two fucking seconds - a triangular shaped hole in the cloud that roams around the world, wherever the wind takes it. It doesn't consign itself to Bermuda; it just happens that the nature of the wind patterns around this crazy planet we call Bob stretch it bigger than anywhere else when it gets to Bermuda, and foolish pilots look up, say to their co-pilots "Well I'll be goddamned... Will you look at that, Jeremy?" Next thing they don't know, they are as dead as the last poor fool who wondered at geometry. The one answer I don't have about this is whether the Bermuda triangle is a pyramid of empty space within clouds, a triangular prism, or just a flat plane. When I saw it this morning, I could see all the way through it, which would suggest that it wasn't a pyramid. Further than that, I wouldn't really like to speculate. I have a new world where I don't have answers.